Articles by TeenChaos

While looking through my video options for this blog, it basically came down to three choices:

1. A whore blowing some dude in a taxi cab
2. A recent high school grad having dirty oral sex while her parents are in another room (while still in her cap and gown!)
3. A white trash, tubby teen getting her ass filled by some skeeze ball twice her age

I decided to go with the first choice, based on tits alone. This chick has amazing ta-tas. I mean, I’m talking world class mammaries here. Plus, she totally looks like a future PTA mom. In 10 years, she’ll totally be running the sober grad program at the local high school. Right now, however, she’s mouth and titty fucking some dude in the backseat of a cab for cash. Enjoy!

Seriously, how does one go about getting an application for this douche’s job? I mean, here you have Vanessa, one of the hottest unsung porn starlets I’ve seen in awhile, playing with her pussy and this tool bag is focusing in on her mouth?! What the fuck?!

Anyway, I’ve never posted a girl going at it by herself, so I decided to start with the best. I found a ton of Vanessa’s work online, so I’ll be posting more of it in the weeks to come (or is it cum? God, I’m so flippin’ witty!). Here, you see Vanessa in her native habitat: on the hood of a car with a big pink vibrating dildo. Mmmmm.

It recently occurred to me that I haven’t posted anything about lesbians in awhile. I know, I know, send me to porn blogger hell! I’ve been so tied up with interracial threesomes and cumshots that I haven’t had a chance to get back to the sapphic side of things. So, for your viewing pleasure, I introduce Julia and Rebecca!!!

Rebecca is pretty hot, despite the fact that she could use a good wax job (unless you’re into that kind of thing…again, I’m not here to judge). I’ve posted part one above, but if you can’t get enough of these girls and want to see where things go from here, I suggest checking out Part II of the action.

I ask you, dear readers: is there ever too much of a good thing? I pose this question now because the video above has just about everything you could ever imagine. Here’s a list of the things that I immediately noticed:

Interracial
Threesome
Cum Shots (two of ‘em)
Facial (see above)
Old hag with horse teeth (this covers both the MILF and animal fantasies)
Huge cock (again, two of them)
Oral
Anal
Double penetration (oral and anal/vag)

I’m sure there’s more features and fetishes to be found, but I can’t stomach watching that shit more than once. Feel free to let me know if you find anything else. On another note, what’s up with both dudes being totally naked, except for socks and gold chains? Is that like, some sort of new ghetto porn thing that I haven’t been made aware of?

Sweet Jesus and holy hell, this is one of the funniest things I’ve seen (at least since last week’s post with the lens switching). I’m going to go ahead and admit something that I’ll probably never live down: I have a secret love for watching QVC at night. Why? Because I can’t get enough of those old hags pitching me Quacker Factory sweaters and cheesy fake diamond jewelry. Every once in awhile, a caller will come along and totally make my night, like this dude.

Special thanks to Norm the porn ninja, who is always on the lookout for filth.

Yesterday I told ya’ll that the next video I posted would have some ATM action in it. In case you aren’t familiar with ATM, check out the video I’ve embedded above (I absolutely refuse to describe it myself, since I have to go home and hang out with my grandparents in a couple of hours).

At first, I thought the Heidi-looking chick had a third nipple. I got really excited, since the last time I saw a third nipple was in high school while watching Mallrats. Upon further inspection, however, it appears as though it’s just your standard trashy rose tattoo. Sorry to get your hopes up.

I mean, in instances like this three is totally a crowd of awesome. It’s like, one of those exclusive parties that you really want to get into, but can’t seem to weasel your way in. Judging by the way she seems to handle those two dudes, I’m willing to put $10 and a tin of chewing tobacco on a bet that says she can handle a third. Since that’s now been established, where do I sign up for the job?

You know what else I enjoy about this video? The narration. Plus, at about :56 into the video she really starts to deep throat the cock, which is hot. In a later scene, which I’m going to post tomorrow (I have to leave something for you to look forward to!) she hits up the ATM…and no, I’m not talking about the big grey box that spits out $20 bills.

My friend Rob recently sent me an email requesting that I post a video of “someone other than a Motel 6 siesta rate whore”, and here she is. This chick is fuckin’ classy, you can just tell. First and foremost, she’s rocking an awesome boob job. If I ever meet the surgeon who gave her that rack, I’ll personally buy him a beer (as long as it’s dollar draft night…the economy is bad, what do you expect?!) and shake his hand.

Second, I’ve got a thing for tan chicks who like to do the nasty in weird positions. That spidery thing she’s doing with her feet you see towards the end of the video? I betcha she picked that trick up at Harvard while boning her oboe tutor in between her quantum physics and neurobiology classes. Finally, the piece de resistance is the cumshot at the end. Holy hell, does this cock gobbler know how to take a load to the face!

I went ahead and skipped to part three of the video, but if you’re interested in seeing how it all began here is Part I and Part II

That’s like, the first thing I’m going to teach my daughters (if I ever get around to having any). I mean, the guy has a straight up Brazilian wax thing going on in his nether regions. Plus, the conspicuous lack of tan lines leads me to believe that he spends his spare time running around naked at some homo beach resort.

As for the girl…you know, I once heard that women get paid up to $3,000 per video shoot. With all that cash flowing into her bank account, you’d think she’d take care of her roots or something. (Yeah, I went there. Deal with it!) On the bright side, at least her underwear matches. Besides aesthetics, this girl has it going on. She’s obviously into sucking cock, and towards the end she even spits on it a little. HOTT.

If yinz are interested, check out Part II and Part III, which includes a hot cum shot

While nothing will ever compare to the awesomeness of the previous video, the show must go on. And really, what better to move on to than a hot skank taking on two basketball teams? Plus, I’m pretty sure she’s foreign, which adds a certain spice to the mix that you don’t get with American girls. Sure, she looks a little like a tranny when the camera is pointed at her face, but who cares? She’s Spanish! She can say things like “aye, Papi!” and “sucio!” The video ends with a five guy cumshot that really ties the whole thing together.